I’ve all but given up on New Year resolutions. Seems I can’t keep them either. But this year I’ve decided to do something different. I’ve compiled a list of “lesser” resolutions — some things I believe I can accomplish in 2013.
Here’s what I will try to work in my new year:
• Remember that no time spent with your children is ever wasted.
• Don’t let a little dispute injure a great friendship.
• Never laugh at anyone’s dream.
• Don’t wash a car, mow a yard or select a Christmas tree after dark.
• When traveling, take two big safety pins so you can pin the motel drapes shut.
• Keep the porch light on until the family is in for the night.
• Rehearse a joke before you tell it.
• Always try the house dressing.
• Believe in love at first sight.
• Send your mother-in-law flowers on your spouse’s birthday.
• Buy ladders, extension cords and garden hoses longer than you think you’ll need.
• Steer clear of any place with a “Ladies Welcome” sign in the window.
• Once in a while invite the person in line behind you to go ahead.
• Exercise patience when behind the wheel of your vehicle – hand gestures are out of the question.
• Own a hammock and use it often.
• Never be photographed holding a cocktail glass.
• Give people more than they expect and do so cheerfully.
• Be as friendly to the janitor as you are to the board chairman.
• Overestimate travel time by 15 percent.
• Never wear a white bathing suit.
• Don’t miss a good idea simply because you don’t like the source.
• When you say, “I’m sorry,” look the person in the eye.
• Trust in God, but always lock your car.
Have a wonderful 2013.
John Schlageck is a Kansas agriculture commentator.
